Journal Entries

4/9/2021—10:53 AM

What I might have been listening to then.

And 'ere the minute hand ticks its way across a round face of glass. The time has come, and I have come with it.

I hope to prevent such a calamity as yesterday's (or rather, this morning's) strange hours. Indeed, it would be greatly appreciated if for once, my torturous writing habits did not create the need for afternoon naps and class-numbing fatigue. I say this as if it is an acceptable excuse for not paying attention as I do, but alas, that is the ones that I have prepared. I do not wish to delve into the deeper and possibly more painful realizations that a full reckoning would imply.

So, we return to happier and more joyful ideas. Victoria—about to embark on her first and most significant intrigue of the summer.

As an aside. I feel like, the more I think about things, the more I find myself being forced into writing Nicolas as a full fledged character with a story, and his own, consistent POV chapters? This is a slightly distressing realization. Maybe it's always the case that authors find themselves creating last minute characters to fill in the gaps of storytelling and plot between chapters—and it is true, sometimes these characters become beloved and compelling in their own right.

I think that the story of Nicolas, as things currently stand, has a clear trajectory, but no clear moral argument. He's the one who is manipulating things behind the scenes. And his brother is the one who has obviously taken the spotlight.

Tarantino advises suspense built upon the fact that the audience is made privy to certain information from the beginning. And sure, I could give away the fact that he's dealing with one of the city council chair candidates early on. But to what end would that information go towards?

I think that it would be a very interesting thing to have Victoria and Arwen meet with, or at least cross paths with each of the city council chair candidates over the course of the story. It wouldn't do to have both of these individuals remain nothing more than names, when they are two of the most driving characters in the plot of the story.

Victoria's chapter, then. Her opening thoughts on Arwen. I don't think that the intrigue happens before the revelation of her scores, but now I am trying to visualize the dips and hills of that chapter. We start, perhaps humorously, by finishing up with the end of chapter five, and upending Arwen's expectations of her academic excellence. Then, a timeskip, glossing over the next few days of the week.

I have given myself enough room in the story that two weeks is the longest expectation that the reader has for Victoria to receive the outcome of her scores. So, we have Victoria arrive home. Her mother breaks the news, but doesn't allow her to see the handwritten notes of the proctor. Marie swears to fix the situation.

Victoria... suffers.

This is one of the lowest points, emotionally speaking, for her character, and I want to be able to rest on that note of emotional anguish for just a little while. But how does she react to the news? Because this is something that could be very telling about her character.

The most emotionally vulnerable thing that I can draw from my own experiences, akin to Victoria, is that I would read. And that the lives of fictional characters is an excellent distraction from your own life, when it has proven too disappointing.

I think that this might be the first time that Victoria mails Arwen a letter? She's at one of her lowest points in the story. She's turned to reading as a form of recovery. And who else would she turn to, or associate with her reading at this point in time?

I think that I could write out the beginnings of a letter—an allusion to her own life, but disguised though the trials and tribulations of a fictional character. And by asking Arwen what he thinks of this character, she's secretly asking what he would do in this situation.

And the response to that would matter. Not just because it's the first instance where one character receives relevant advice from another, but because it's a baring of truths. Even while under the guise of discussing a fictional character.

After this chapter will be a POV chapter from Nicolas, on the first protest, and after that, we will return to... Arwen's point of view? To be honest, not something that I initially planned for.

If it is Arwen's POV that carries the initial investigation, then one of my earliest planned scenes will have to be shelved for later use. Perhaps in the next chapter, as a recap. But Harriet and her not so subtle interest is one of the more endearing things that I have come up with in the early planning stages of this story. So, Harriet and Victoria's time off scene will need to be recapped in the next chapter, when we return to Victoria's point of view.

I do want the characters to meet both of the political candidates at some point in the story, but I think that I want it to happen through Victoria's POV. So her first time encountering one of these candidates will happen as she and Arwen return to the office of her uncle? And perhaps they overhear one of the more important background events happening in the city. That the protest has frightened people, that the government is deciding what should be done with those responsible. At this stage, perhaps we meet not just one, but both of the candidates at the same time? Maybe Arwen meets one, and Victoria another? Or maybe Victoria and Arwen are waiting for one to finish speaking with the uncle, and the other is waiting outside of the office.

But all of these chapter ideas are in the future. Tonight, we must focus only on what has been placed directly before us.

What does Arwen advise Victoria?

It has to be something important. And indeed, it must affect Victoria's own way of thinking, because she returns to the office with a fresh sense of determination afterwards.

It may be in the context of romance. A character falls in love with a mysterious gentleman, only to be left waiting at a station for a train that never arrives. And Arwen's response to all this, of course, is clear. He thinks that the woman would be silly to spend the rest of her life pining after some cad that ultimately left her behind, and proved unfaithful. He's never liked these kinds of stories, (perhaps it hits a little close to home), but his advice is that the woman should direct her attentions to what position she already has, and indeed, to make a life of her own. Forget the guy.

• A Food Taster in Härtel—A Connecticut Yankee in King Arthur's Court. Except maybe a surgeon, or doctor of some kind, who's nearly executed for weird future knowledge, but offered an out of becoming the king's food taster, and builds up influence from there.
• A Party of Three—Holmesian mystery and not a ripoff of Murders in the Rue Morgue.
• History of Warfare in Linderoth
• Brisbane Hollow—Wuthering Heights, but also The Fear Street Saga, which is that horror series I read as a kid, featuring some kind of cursed family magic?
• The Plainer Moore—Jane Eyre? The main character was a ghost all along!
• Add some story about a cartographer/explorer who's definitely not Indiana Jones.

4/8/2021—10:53 AM

What I might have been listening to then.

Well. You knew that you couldn't hold off on it forever.

Though really, I don't think that there was any reason to enter a hostage negotiation with yourself. You're perfectly capable of peaceful negotiation without the use of tense standoffs.

The fact that you do so, so often, perhaps indicates something else that should be addressed in the near future. But all that aside, we must address the issue of chapter five, which is the current piece of work that I have set before myself.

Chapter five began with the first interaction between Victoria and Arwen. They don't like one another, of course, but that is an issue that must slowly be addressed over the course of the intervening chapters. They must develop a mutual understanding if they are to proceed with their partnership over the course of the summer.

The first obstacle that I have set before them is a violent protest gone wrong in the whatever district of the city, Because I am making this all up as I go along, the names of these places and districts are literally autogenerated and then backfilled as necessary because I am making them up. I may eventually need to create an index for myself, just so I can keep everything in line, but that is irrelevant. Present day, we return to the antagonistic relationship between Victoria and Arwen. And they do need to come to some sort of deal.

Like the original work that this idea was taken from, things must go full circle.

Victoria and Arwen aren't going to be making the kind of deal where they exchange letters and write one another for a fee. That kind of arrangement was always special to another dynamic duo, and I would hesitate to take it wholesale and to replicate it within my own work.

So we should consider another alternative, where I must come up with something equally creative.

I don't think that Victoria would allow herself to be bribed, at this point. Or that she would agree to pay Arwen to do something, unless that something is well and truly extraordinary. In the original outline of this story, that extraordinary something was being taught magic.

In the current draft of the story, that kind of magic has been completely removed from the system, and there are no remnants of it that can be salvaged. You cannot simply teach someone to use a Talent—it's considered innate, and being able to coach someone is perhaps the most that you can do.

So we must move on. It is no longer magic that is the object of the exchange. What is valuable to Victoria, and perhaps Arwen in turn?

My idea yesterday was to have Victoria coach Arwen in the ways of Latin academic phrases, since he wouldn't have reason to be terribly familiar with them. Now, that's still an idea that I can go through but it doesn't quite hold the same cutthroat and amusing dynamic that the idea of trading money for friendship does.

Maybe book exchange? It could be the case that Victoria brought books with her to her Uncle's office.

So, Arwen might have an interest in reading. But now the tables turn. What could he possibly offer in return?

Victoria is inclined to be nice, but he's already proven himself to be a very rude boy, so she has no reason to be particularly kind.

She might go up and apologize to him at a later date, but not yet, and not now.

"You're not very good at being mean," said Arwen.

"I don't usually have to be mean," said Victoria.

4/7/2021—1:48 AM

What I might have been listening to then.

I should have started ages ago. But alas, it seems that I have spent the time listening to music, watching 2b2t lore videos on Minecraft, and then whiling away the hours in preparation. Or something akin to preparation.

But in this all lies a fallacy that can perhaps be directly addressed. Every mannerism and impression that I have adopted over the past five days has been under the guise of incredible suffering. That the undertaking of a 2K a day wordcount is a task of incredible suffering—and to be sure, there is some suffering involved, but most of it is at the beginning and the end.

The suffering comes from the dreading, and the anticipation. It comes from a place of deep insecurity and a feeling of unpreparedness within myself, but perhaps I should try and reevaluate that opinion.

There is nothing writ out on the bedrock of existence that says that writing must be an ordeal. There is no rulebook out there saying that the writing of two thousand words must be suffering—or indeed, that it must take at least four hours or three hours at a time.

No, the only person who has set that expectation is myself. And thus, the key is revealed. The only person that is capable of revising that opinion is also myself.

In the past few days, I have written more writing preludes than I have at any other time I can recall. Part of it is to warm up, and to get accustomed to the experience of typing quickly.

But the other part of it is a psychological pep talk. An opportunity to reflect and to exercise a measure of self honesty.

One of the first exercises that led up to my current project is an attempt to write at a speed that was, if not exactly matching my maximum, then at least near it, because a maximum of 72 WPM, even halved is an incredible rate at which you can produce words. At that rate, you could finish the task of 2K a day in.. a mere half hour. You could, at a speed that was presumably half of 72 WPM, finish 2K in an hour. And then, at the very extreme quartering of all expectations, finish in a neat 2 hours.

These are all numbers and conjecture, but they do serve to instill a measure of hope and self confidence in myself again. So, proceeding forwards with the goal of these pep talks, I'll remind myself of all the things that I like to remind myself of before writing.

1. That other people have done this before, with worse concepts and more stereotyped characters/themes/ideas. Your story already stands out at the idea phase. The only difference between you and them—and indeed, the only thing that stands in the way of you being better than them—is reaching the finish line. All of these other YA authors wrote till the end of a full book—and that is proof that you can do it to.
2. This is a first draft. The point of it is to produce a basic block of material that can be refined and cultured into a better story over time. It need not be perfect, and indeed, the expectation of perfection will choke the project in its cradle. So let go a little, and let yourself think freely. You'll at least have something to work with in the end—and think about it. the better you get at refining your high speed writing, the more meaningful that progress will be n the long run.
3. The experience of writing is not so different from that of a lucid dream. You are fully aware that all of the experiences in your head are fully imagined; indeed, you are fully aware of the cold fingers and the persistent typing of keys as you live through the sights and sounds, and emotional anguish of this other life, and yet your sole purpose here is to merge the living of the dream with the description of it in the written word.

Just look at what you have done so far, in retrospect. A fully reasoned out block of text, and a heartwarming introspection nearing 700 words, in half an hour. This is definitely something that isn't quite at your maximum typing speed, but certainly near it. All you have to do, is displace that speed and sense of eloquent urgency elsewhere.

So, where did we leave off? A presumed dinner scene with the uncle? It's ultimately unimportant to the plot if it doesn't contribute any important information. In fact, all of the important information that it was meant to convey has already been conveyed through the lunch scene earlier in chapter one.

So, I have come to the decision that this scene, for the good of the story, should be removed. That leaves me queued up with the scene that supposedly follows it. The first time that both Arwen and Victoria meet one another, written first from Victoria's perspective and then from Arwen's.

But think about it. Which would you rather want to read?

Chapter three might have gone on long enough. It's been several thousand words of Victoria's perspective, and starting off their initial meeting with an alternation scheme as I have now means that chapters might be laid out like this.

Arwen. Initial thoughts on Victoria, and the instant dislike that he has for her character. This first chapter does nothing but introduce the two characters, and the uncle assigns them some busy work of going through correspondence and unencrypting what's there. This would serve as both an introduction to the uncle's Talent and Arwen's thoughts on the matter, as well as an opportunity for he and Victoria to interact. The scene I have in mind is one where Arwen doesn't recognize the fact that the letter begins with a quotation in latin, and Victoria teaches him the meaning of the scriptures. He wouldn't know, coming from where he comes from, but the experience ought to be galling for him all the same. Though I do wonder what it means to show Victoria in a academically superior footing right away.

Victoria. Follow up perspective on Arwen, and wondering why he seems to have taken such an immediate dislike to her. This is the formal beginning of the summer plot. There is a protest. The kids have a flyer, and they go to investigate the printmaking shop where it presumably originated.

This chapter arrangement seems fine. The only issue that I can think of so far is that it does not adequately set up the conflict happening in the city, in fact, that may require a POV chapter from a secondary character who I have only recently begun to develop. The older of the two brothers, the younger of which heads the most radicalized wing of the unionization fight.

This is where things become fractious, but I think that this viewpoint may be important nonetheless. Not just to set up the political conflict happening in the city, but to prime the narrative of the rich vs. the poor, and to lead us into the resentment that this character feels for his brother.

The chapter begins with the brother's return to the city, airship, maybe? But rail is more likely, for someone of his economic class. Talk about that at the beginning of the chapter.

We then end with the revelation that the older brother has received some kind of communication from a benefactor, or wishes to talk his brother into the matter? I need to think out this ending a bit more, because I don't think I want to reveal the name of the benefactor, but things must be movng rapidly nonetheless.

Aha. I have an idea. The younger brother has fallen in with a radical crowd in his time away from college, and is a young and budding public speaker. He receives correspondence from the mysterious benefactor, and the older brother is the one who receives it first. And then he chooses to respond in his brothers stead, impersonating him.

Drama! Suspense! Mystery!

I like this idea. And I can end with a glossed over description of the older brother receiving the letter, the younger not bothering, and then his reaction to reading it, the fact that he's impersonating his brother in the response.

The question is. Does this POV come before Arwen's?

It's a narrative that is so far completely disconnected from what's happening in the city. At this point, Arwen's chapter does not actually introduce enough new information for the order to matter, on those grounds. But I think it is important to lead with the plot relevant information first, rather than the wishy washy chapter from Arwen's POV.

So setup is required first. And names. Sorry to the main investigation plot. You must wait a while more, it seems.

And as luck would have it, I have a list of actors for a... revolutionary of his own time.

Edmond works. I like that one. Now for the next... Nicolas?

Family name is... Aretos, which sounds too rich. Vaude, which sounds like vaudeville.

Garrel? Garish.

Let's go with Van Daële.

Edmond Van Daële, and Nicolas Van Daële both sound good. So which is the older and which is the younger.

Edmond feels... younger to me.

So, there we have it.

Edmond Van Daële as the rising star of the city, and Nicolas Van Daële as the resentful older brother.

Better question. What does the older brother even do for a living?